Leadville early Ride Report - August 10, 2013 - Life sometimes throws you some curve balls, and you need to have that catcher's glove ready!
Just not my day, I guess. It was my slowest time out the start and up Kevin's because it was just too crowded. I never got off the bike with all the walkers and traffic jam. Once it cleared, I did my best - few problems with camel bak tube and drinking, but weather was perfect, fingers almost froze off. Why would I wear liners over fingerless gloves? lol they are liners to go inside gloves, not be a glove ! lol - super cold fingers and toes, that was it - but that certainly did not slow me down-
Got stuck behind a few slow people on Powerline I could not pass. Once on the flat, I tried drafting with a guy who was too slow, but i was not sure what to do? Now I know I should have passed him and not worried about drafting there. I was not tired. I was thinking of saving energy, but should have been thinking of making up time.
I flew by pipeline, knowing I was running late - finally i could not hold it anymore and I had to pee, but if you know me, that only takes 45 seconds - lol - then down a rocky section, my seat bag with tools came off and was bouncing off my rear tire. I stopped and put the velcro back on. Ten minutes later, it did the same thing. Stopped again to fix it. The third time it happened, I took off my blonde hat and said, hell with it - It took some time to take off my camel bak and I stuffed it in the camel bak. Three very wasted timely stops that could have been avoided. This happened before on a training ride and I did purchase a new bag and was advised not to change it. I should have listened to myself!
Then a few slower guys on the pipeline single track i could not get by -
Thank you to the guy who was cramping who would go by me and say, "come on racer, we can do this"- Some people were cruising and chatting once they knew they would not make four hours. I kept going as fast as i could, standing up and giving it all I had!
Then coming in to Twin Lakes, the pros are FLYING back on the single track right before the dam, and if I did not stop in the bushes, they would have run me over, don't blame them. Two more times off the bike letting them go by. In my heart, I had ignored the lady, and kept going, I had a good chance. But that is just breaking rules.
When I got through the chip station a few minutes late, she said, you're done, go to the guy in the white hat to cut my wrist band - I could not find the man in the white hat. People were telling me " just keeping going, they did not take your band" - I had already killed ten minutes trying to find him and with people there. I was absolutely not tired, by any stretch, not at 41 miles - but I did not feel that cheating was the right thing to do. I don't like breaking the rules and, though I know I could have headed up Columbine and they would have never known. There are rules in races like this and we all need to follow them. If the lady said, " you missed the mark,even by one minute, I have to follow the rules - The time and money I spent on this race, I hope will make me faster for my next race. So I showed up. I did my best ----
I have been in bed crying and seem to not be able to move of being so disappointed in myself.
I will be back next year under, what I know will be much better circumstances. A lot of drama here since Thursday and I my head was screwed on backward since then. But I slept well and felt great this morning. There are no excuses. Some of us make it and some of us don't. But I will keep on trying. I already made my reservation for next year! From this day on, I have learned to let emotional turmoil fuck with my races!
The learning experience is something money cannot buy for my first time here. It was fun and and I am thrilled that I had plenty of of energy at mile 41 - so, there is still hope for me to make 100 MTB to the finish. If anybody can tell me the next one (anywhere) please do! I am on a mission! I am not sure exactly by how much I missed it, but not much. and 41 miles and around 3700 feet of climbing - average 9.7 speed. I have to get stronger. I have to work harder. I am not a life-time athlete and certainly new to racing. So, I am getting back on the horse and working harder. I had a great vacation in CO and it felt great to take some over-due time off work and play a bit.
The one thing that is going to get me through this day is what Seth Davidson said to me yesterday:
"It's only a bike race. Enjoy the moment, it's all we have" - Thank you, Seth -
Again, I learned from many mistakes that I won't ever make again, and I mean NEVER -
I am sorry for all the people I disappointed. Thank you all for your support. It was close and if my seat bag did come off three times, I would have made it. This is a great race and I cannot wait to come back next year - I am grateful for the opportunity and all the friends who supported me -
So, when the tears run out, I will drag my ass out of this bedroom and go see my friend Grace - Anybody have a good suggestion for the next race for me? I am open. Maybe I better start dropping in on those fast South Bay road rides! loll -
Today was better than a day at Hoag Hospital ( right, Scott?)- And today was better than chemo. Today was better than a hangover. Today was better than sitting on the couch thinking about exercise. Today was an experience of a dream I have long dreamed of.
Many people could not even get on a bike today. So I had a great bike ride and putting the mistakes in my journal Thank you Kirsten and Grace and Susan Gibson and Robert and Angie - and BIGGEST THANKS TO PAUL AND SUZANNE CHIN WHO TRIED TO GET ME OUT OF MY EMOTIONAL TURMOIL and supported me, hugged me, and crewed for me.
Nice to know who your friends really are! And I have some awesome friends.
You people afraid to race and who are afraid to try because you may lose or may not finish - Yeah, I am talking to you…..Get off your ass and get on it. Yes, I feel a little like a loser today. I did not finish. I am not thrilled. But if I had to pick between feeling sad now and still getting 41 miles of hard riding in, and sitting home thinking, "I won't do it unless I am going to shine" - well, I am happy I did it. I knew I would be very close on cutoffs, but that did not stop me from trying. How can I get better if I don't keep trying?
I smiled. I had fun. I was thinking cool colors when my legs burned. I never walked a foot and I think I learned track-standing on Kevin's - lol - So I will keep the positive thoughts and throw away the negative - Thank you again to everybody - We'll do it again next year! Thank you Leadville Camp, Lifetime Fitness and my new Leadville family for loving me to freedom.
Now will somebody help me get out of bed, please? lol