Saturday, August 22, 2015
August 22, 2009 - Six years Sober!
Six years ago today, I was too ill
to get out of bed, too ill to even make a phone call. My mother was on her
dying bed and I was too ill to travel. My femur was broken and I finally moved
up to crutches from the wheelchair. I was bleeding in all the wrong
places....Paralyzed with fear in every direction, my darkness was getting
darker, my hope was lost, and any Light I used to have I could not see even a
flare. I was hiding in my house with blinds shut from my daughter so she would
not see me. (this never worked BTW, she was always onto my game) And most of
you know she saved my life in 1997 by taking me to rehab and in 1998 by walking
out the door with her bags.
We all have
celebration dates, natal birthdays, remission from cancer, etc.
I have been
blessed with four: The day I was born (least important) Breast cancer last
chemo date; Multiple myeloma last chemo date; And last hangover date - (most
important) -
I heard a lady I
met in Paris in 2005 say, "I got sober the day before I died" - I
will never forget that, because that is my story, no doubt.
I don't keep this
a secret because I am not ashamed, and if you keep the fact that there is hope
too much of a secret, nobody will find hope, as I did. I was never able to be a
social drinker from the get go back in elementary school. The police were at my
house when I was 11 and got the neighborhood kids drunk. The officer that
arrested me when I was 18 for driving and drinking became my first husband.
(poor guy) My battles have been many, like all of us. We all have our demons.
The second time I went to jail was the day I found out I had breast cancer. Oh,
those were the good ole days.
My doctors always
told me that alcohol would kill me before the cancers, but stopping seemed
impossible. I tried and tried. It is a disease like no other, IMO, and yes,
somewhat embarrassing to exploit on FB. My oncologist told me once, as I was
about to share in front of many doctors at UCLA about surviving cancer, that I
needed to share my story with all the details, not just the cancer topics.
Sunday, July 5, 2015
2015 4th of July with my family -
This weekend we decided last minute to head to the Embassy Suites in Oxnard. It's on the beach and we could all be together. We had a lot of memorable moments and I am so grateful.
Dani is having her colon removed on July 17, Friday, for her ulcerative colitis and I am happy we had some family fun pre-surgery. She will be recovering for a long time.
Please keep her in your prayers.
h
Dani is having her colon removed on July 17, Friday, for her ulcerative colitis and I am happy we had some family fun pre-surgery. She will be recovering for a long time.
Please keep her in your prayers.
Saturday, July 4, 2015
Sunday, June 28, 2015
Breckenridge CTS mountain bike camp June 2015
-This week has been beautiful. I traveled with my friend Eric Zubick to recon for the Breck Epic bike race on August 9th.
It is beautiful here and I met many new friends! - I will upload photos and more ride reports when I get back.
Flying back late tonight out of Denver. Highly recommend Breck Guide Bikes
I rode technical terrain I never thought was possible on a 29er and loved the seat dropper.
Danielle is having her colon removed on July 19th and everything will depend on how she does as to whether I come back in August to race in Colorado. Noah's parents will be taking care of the kids and Noah will be taking time off work. We are all going to the pre op tomorrow so I can learn more about this. I am happy this will be then end of her suffering for several years with UC.
I would love to live here in the summer. The altitude makes it tough to climb in these mountains.
On a very sad note, my dear friend Angela, lost her son at age 27 to lung cancer two days ago.
He has been in pain for a year and he fought hard. God, please help his mother through grief that I cannot even begin to imagine.
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Oh, and the nipple tattoos I got last Monday are doing great. I am so happy I did it.
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